Self-Esteem

 Become a Queen With Self-Esteem!

I struggled and struggled trying to think of something to write this week. For some reason the only thing that I could think about was Dove Chocolate... and I could write pages about that stuff. But my goal this week is to "be more missionary minded" so I had to think of something else.

Finally I realized what I needed to write about. Sister Ellis and I got asked to teach the Young Women about "self-esteem." This completely shocked both of us because we felt like we were the absolute wrong people to be talking to others about this. The week before we taught, we could not think of ANYTHING to say to these girls. We were at a complete loss. But after some excess "lds.org" searching and a headache, we found a wonderful talk by President Faust about self-esteem.

He says, "Self-esteem goes to the very heart of our personal growth and accomplishment. Self-esteem is the glue that holds together our self-reliance, our self-control, our self-approval or disapproval, and keeps all self-defense mechanisms secure. It is a protection against excessive self-deception, self-distrust, self-reproach, and plain old-fashion selfishness. After a lifetime of observing, I have found the greatest respect is owed not necessarily to the rich, or the famous, but to the quiet, unsung, unknown heroes whose true identity, like the unknown soldier’s, is known only to God. The unsung often have little of status, but much of worth"

There are 6 main ingredients into making a "self-esteem cupcake" (Sister Ellis used her artsy skills to make them the cutest cupcakes).

1. Keep Your Free Agency- When we give up our agency, we are at the mercy of our addictions. There are many addictions in this world and ANY of them can cause us to lose all self-esteem. When we are free from them, we have our agency and we are able to rely on ourselves for more things in life. "In Proverbs we read: “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls” (Proverbs 25:28)."

2. Humility- "It is the humility that can accept and live with one’s own warts without cosmetics to hide them. It is important to learn to live with our uncorrectable physical and mental defects without comment and without explanation" Elder Faust says, as he explains what kind of humility helps self-esteem. Humility to listen to other people's suggestions can make us better people! I know that is something I DEFINITELY have a hard time remembering

3. Honesty- Being honest with ourselves, and with others. When we are truthful to others, they gain our trust and come to us in times of need. We are serving them, and that helps us to feel better about ourselves. When we are true to ourselves, we accept ourselves as we are and move forward with trying to make correctable things, better in our personalities/lives.

4. Love Work- Growing up, I didn't think that these two words belonged together in a sentence. But the older I get, the more I learn that working gives me such a sense of accomplishment! My mom is an avid runner, and I started trying to be like her (impossible because she's amazing) and I realized that the initial "running" part was not my favorite. But the success I felt after was incredible! I've still yet to get to the point that she's at, where she loves the running part too. She's crazy!
"An ordinary, garden-variety talent can be nurtured and nourished into a great gift through hard work" Elder Faust says. So start practicing something that you've always wanted to be good at, today! It will make you self-esteem sky rocket.

5. Love Others and Yourself- We asked the girls "which one of these is harder to do?" when we were teaching them, and almost all of them said "themselves." But as we come to love others more, we end up loving ourselves more as well! It's a win-win deal. The best way I've found to love others, is through service. When you are serving someone, it's really hard not to like them.

6. Love God- This one is the most important ingredient in our recipe. The first great commandment is to love God with all our hearts. When we do so, Heavenly Father blesses us beyond anything we can imagine.


And there you have it folks. That is Elder Faust's recipe for self-esteem. I know that these days, it's so hard to feel good about yourself. I spent hours and hours staring at pictures of models that I wanted to look like and feeling like I wasn't good enough. But I know that I am a daughter of God and that he has made everyone EXACTLY as they are supposed to look. He has given us each unique talents, and gifts to share with others. He loves us more than we could ever fathom. As long as we try to do our best and follow the commandments, we will one day rest from all our sorrows. We will be perfected and we will be with those that love us completely. I'm so excited for that day!

So next time you look in the mirror and have an inkling of  self-doubt, remember this formula. I know that it will bring you closer to Christ and, in turn, help you to love yourself more! Try it today! (Free of charge.)


Elder Faust's Talk
http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=852

Be As a Little Child

To Become Childlike

Hibernation: to spend winter in close quarters in a dormant condition, as bears and certain other animals.

This is the only explanation I could come up with for why I haven't posted for a couple months. I thought it was cold in Utah, but man! It's freezing in Kentucky! Okay it's not a good excuse but my companion was playing with the dictionary and that ended up being the one we used...

Have you ever heard someone described as an "old soul?" My companion describes it as someone who has the wisdom as though he's experienced a lot, but is young in age. Well I've learned throughout my life that I have an old, grumpy, grandpa-like soul. Now this is by no means has the positive connotation that "old soul" has. Ever heard of being "childlike?" Yes, that, my dear friends, is what I'll be writing about today. My journey to try and become childlike.

Recently I was noticing that no matter where my companion and I went, the children were the same. Whether we were in a small house, with cockroaches running up and down the walls; or in a giant house with a maid cleaning in the background, the kids had the same desires, and reactions toward the gospel. They get so excited when you talk to them about Jesus, they want to share their candy with you, they give you best friend bracelets and do your hair, they climb all over you just wanting a hug and attention. But most of all, they listen intently when we talk about the gospel and they absolutely light up.

“Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

“Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3–4).

I'll always remember my mom coming home from church one afternoon and saying that my little brother (then 5 years old) had been crying during a song they were singing in primary. She asked him what was the matter and he replied "that song just makes tears come out of my eyes." Little children are the prime examples of the kind of disciples we need to be. They are so close to the spirit that they don't question any feeling they have. 

I struggled with my testimony and having faith for a lot of years. My brain would go into analytical mode and I'd come up with every excuse under the sun for why the gospel wasn't true. I couldn't just say, "I know it's true because I feel it in my heart and I've prayed about it." I needed proof. Rarely do children need proof for things. They accept the answer, without reasoning, and go on with life. They see another child that's cold outside, and they want to help them! They cry when they've done something bad and realize that they shouldn't have done that. And they love unconditionally.I was having a really hard time voicing my testimony at a family's house the other day. I ended up just breaking down and the whole lesson was a mess of blubbering tears. Their little daughter came and just stroked my head while I talked and asked why I was crying. It made me cry even more! Yes because I miss my mom, but also because I know that was a small act of Heavenly Father showing me what HE would do if He were here.

Jean A. Stevens says, "Have some of life’s experiences taken from you the believing heart and childlike faith you once had? If so, look around at the children in your life. And then look again. They may be children in your family, across the street, or in the Primary in your ward. If we have a heart to learn and a willingness to follow the example of children, their divine attributes can hold a key to unlocking our own spiritual growth."

 

 Becoming childlike is not easy. Especially when we feel hardened from the world, like Jean A. Stevens talked about. But it is doable! It is something that God has asked of us! I know that our lives will become so much easier when we just accept the things of the Lord and do His will. When we love those around us, as children do, and we give our self to Him. Follow your children's example!

"If we have a heart to learn and a willingness to follow the example of children, their divine attributes can hold a key to unlocking our own spiritual growth."

-Jean A. Stevens

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/04/become-as-a-little-child?lang=eng