A Fly on the Wall in a Mormon Home

The Family

Today I want to write about something that has been on my mind a lot lately. No not food or how I'm going to get to Harry Potter World. It's been my family. If there has been one thing that I've learned on my mission, it's been that the family is under attack. Have you ever wondered how you can strengthen your family? Well I have a very strong testimony that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints focuses their entire teaching around the family. Here's a little view into what the church teaches on how to raise "Christ centered families."

It's 6:30 am I hear dad's footsteps coming down the stairs. He knocks quietly on each bedroom door, then returns to the kitchen and sits down at the table. Struggling to open our eyes, we all shuffle to the table, scriptures in hand. Family scripture study. The church has been advising families, for years, to make this a daily routine in our homes. I am a firm believer that my family became stronger and more united because of this. We ended each study with a family prayer and rushed off to school or work. But not before our parents had given us the "spiritual armor" we needed to get through the day. 

LDS (Latter-Day Saint) families are also advised to do "Family Home Evening." It is a night, set-aside each week, where the family gathers and has a spiritual lesson, council, activity, etc. In my house we knew that this was Monday night and that we should make sure we were home with the family to be able to take part in "FHE." We weren't always consistent in doing it, but I know that Heavenly Father blessed us the weeks that we did.

"And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of the,
And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye e converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. 
Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kindgom of heaven. 
And whoso shall receive on such little child in my name receiveth me. 
But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea." 

If that doesn't show you how important children are to God, then I don't know what does! The emphasizes this so well! They actually have a class that you can take that helps you become better spouses, parents, and disciples of Christ! I'm pretty sure that my parents memorized this book, because I've been going through it and they did so much from it that really worked!

My favorite part of the whole book is where it lays out what the roles are for each spouse.

Fathers- You are to be the breadwinner, lead the family spiritually, love your wife, and make sure your family has the necessities. This isn't where it ends though. The church also highly encourages fathers to go on daddy daughter/father son dates, give your family blessings (if the Priesthood is held), have one-on-one interviews with your kids to see how they are doing, teach your kids to work, hold scripture study and prayer, serve happily in church callings, attend the temple, encourage good music etc, develop family traditions, and do good activities with the kids.


This might seem overwhelming, but these things are emphasized and taught every week in church! I know that it can be done. I have an incredible father that somehow managed to hold 2 jobs and be an incredible dad.

Mothers- You are the nurturers. Mothers are advised to stay at home (if financially possible) with their children. They are raising the next generation! This is looked upon as one of the most important jobs in the entire church! They are encouraged to play with their kids, teach their kids the gospel, help them to learn good values and to do well in school, teach them talents and skills that will be useful to their lives, read to them, love them, encourage them, build them up, and help them to know they are sons and daughters of God. THIS is one intense role. And that's not the end of their duties.

My mom. I have no idea even where to start with her. All the days I came home from school and she just sat there and listened to my complaining, then went and cleaned the house, then taxied us everywhere, then made sure we had a nice meal to sit down to together as a family, then got all our homework done, helped us get ready for bed, read us stories and said prayers with us, then got up continually throughout the night when we had bad dreams or just wanted to see her. That takes some serious awesomeness. There's a very special place for mothers in Heaven.

Family is central to God's plan. Central. Like, as important to God as a wand is to Harry. God gave a  commandment to Adam and Eve that they were to "multiply and replenish the earth." Being a parent is the most rewarding thing that Heavenly Father says you can do. It's the only thing that will continue to bless you for the rest of your life. It must be hard! I don't know, I've never done it. But I do know that through the teachings of the gospel, we can learn how to raise our children with God. We can help them become the next generation of disciples. We can prepare them for salvation.


"Marriage and Family Relations" manual
http://www.lds.org/manual/marriage-and-family-relations-instructors-manual?lang=eng

"The Family: A Proclamation to the World"
 http://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation

How to do Family Home Evening
http://www.lds.org/topics/family-home-evening?lang=eng
 

Departing Missionaries: January 2014

Departing Missionaries: January 2014

Transfer meetings hold every single emotion imaginable, for a missionary. The new elders and sisters, fresh from the MTC in Utah, are questioning what in the world they did to themselves; the new missionaries are still questioning what in the world they did to themselves; the older missionaries are starting to panic, thinking about life "not as a missionary"; and the departing missionaries are planning escape routes and are thinking "no one is making me go home!"

Toward the beginning of the meeting, President Andersen has all the departing missionaries line up and gives them time to give the rest of the missionaries advice. This has always been my favorite part of the meeting. Standing in front of 100 or so missionaries, these elders and sisters are the greatest examples to us. They've served a faithful 18 months or 2 years. They've gone through depression, losses, disappointments, sickness, scary experiences, snow, ice, and almost everything else imaginable. But as they look over this crow of younger missionaries, they always have a look of wisdom in their eyes. They know that this was the only thing that they were supposed to be doing with their lives during this time. They know that they have experienced that joy only seeing someone accept the gospel can bring. They've changed others lives, and they've changed the younger missionaries testimonies. They've been the Lord's faithful servants, and they've endured to the end.

This transfer meeting was special to me because I had a lot of good missionary friends leaving to start a new chapter of their lives. I'm so grateful to everything they taught me. I'm grateful for the time they took away from their lives to bring others to Christ. I'm grateful for the loving example they were to me, and for how Christlike they had all become. A mission didn't change them. They truly changed their mission.


A huge thanks to the departing missionaries. Elder Bethers, Elder Brewer, Elder Pulsipher, Elder Neville, Elder Riley, Elder Heiner, Elder Dempsey, Sister fowler, Sister Hill, and Sister Means.

You elders and sisters are incredible and the Lord is going to bless you so much. Thank you for everything you have done. Stay close to your Savior, and never forget these experiences you've had! We love you!

Self-Esteem

 Become a Queen With Self-Esteem!

I struggled and struggled trying to think of something to write this week. For some reason the only thing that I could think about was Dove Chocolate... and I could write pages about that stuff. But my goal this week is to "be more missionary minded" so I had to think of something else.

Finally I realized what I needed to write about. Sister Ellis and I got asked to teach the Young Women about "self-esteem." This completely shocked both of us because we felt like we were the absolute wrong people to be talking to others about this. The week before we taught, we could not think of ANYTHING to say to these girls. We were at a complete loss. But after some excess "lds.org" searching and a headache, we found a wonderful talk by President Faust about self-esteem.

He says, "Self-esteem goes to the very heart of our personal growth and accomplishment. Self-esteem is the glue that holds together our self-reliance, our self-control, our self-approval or disapproval, and keeps all self-defense mechanisms secure. It is a protection against excessive self-deception, self-distrust, self-reproach, and plain old-fashion selfishness. After a lifetime of observing, I have found the greatest respect is owed not necessarily to the rich, or the famous, but to the quiet, unsung, unknown heroes whose true identity, like the unknown soldier’s, is known only to God. The unsung often have little of status, but much of worth"

There are 6 main ingredients into making a "self-esteem cupcake" (Sister Ellis used her artsy skills to make them the cutest cupcakes).

1. Keep Your Free Agency- When we give up our agency, we are at the mercy of our addictions. There are many addictions in this world and ANY of them can cause us to lose all self-esteem. When we are free from them, we have our agency and we are able to rely on ourselves for more things in life. "In Proverbs we read: “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls” (Proverbs 25:28)."

2. Humility- "It is the humility that can accept and live with one’s own warts without cosmetics to hide them. It is important to learn to live with our uncorrectable physical and mental defects without comment and without explanation" Elder Faust says, as he explains what kind of humility helps self-esteem. Humility to listen to other people's suggestions can make us better people! I know that is something I DEFINITELY have a hard time remembering

3. Honesty- Being honest with ourselves, and with others. When we are truthful to others, they gain our trust and come to us in times of need. We are serving them, and that helps us to feel better about ourselves. When we are true to ourselves, we accept ourselves as we are and move forward with trying to make correctable things, better in our personalities/lives.

4. Love Work- Growing up, I didn't think that these two words belonged together in a sentence. But the older I get, the more I learn that working gives me such a sense of accomplishment! My mom is an avid runner, and I started trying to be like her (impossible because she's amazing) and I realized that the initial "running" part was not my favorite. But the success I felt after was incredible! I've still yet to get to the point that she's at, where she loves the running part too. She's crazy!
"An ordinary, garden-variety talent can be nurtured and nourished into a great gift through hard work" Elder Faust says. So start practicing something that you've always wanted to be good at, today! It will make you self-esteem sky rocket.

5. Love Others and Yourself- We asked the girls "which one of these is harder to do?" when we were teaching them, and almost all of them said "themselves." But as we come to love others more, we end up loving ourselves more as well! It's a win-win deal. The best way I've found to love others, is through service. When you are serving someone, it's really hard not to like them.

6. Love God- This one is the most important ingredient in our recipe. The first great commandment is to love God with all our hearts. When we do so, Heavenly Father blesses us beyond anything we can imagine.


And there you have it folks. That is Elder Faust's recipe for self-esteem. I know that these days, it's so hard to feel good about yourself. I spent hours and hours staring at pictures of models that I wanted to look like and feeling like I wasn't good enough. But I know that I am a daughter of God and that he has made everyone EXACTLY as they are supposed to look. He has given us each unique talents, and gifts to share with others. He loves us more than we could ever fathom. As long as we try to do our best and follow the commandments, we will one day rest from all our sorrows. We will be perfected and we will be with those that love us completely. I'm so excited for that day!

So next time you look in the mirror and have an inkling of  self-doubt, remember this formula. I know that it will bring you closer to Christ and, in turn, help you to love yourself more! Try it today! (Free of charge.)


Elder Faust's Talk
http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=852

Be As a Little Child

To Become Childlike

Hibernation: to spend winter in close quarters in a dormant condition, as bears and certain other animals.

This is the only explanation I could come up with for why I haven't posted for a couple months. I thought it was cold in Utah, but man! It's freezing in Kentucky! Okay it's not a good excuse but my companion was playing with the dictionary and that ended up being the one we used...

Have you ever heard someone described as an "old soul?" My companion describes it as someone who has the wisdom as though he's experienced a lot, but is young in age. Well I've learned throughout my life that I have an old, grumpy, grandpa-like soul. Now this is by no means has the positive connotation that "old soul" has. Ever heard of being "childlike?" Yes, that, my dear friends, is what I'll be writing about today. My journey to try and become childlike.

Recently I was noticing that no matter where my companion and I went, the children were the same. Whether we were in a small house, with cockroaches running up and down the walls; or in a giant house with a maid cleaning in the background, the kids had the same desires, and reactions toward the gospel. They get so excited when you talk to them about Jesus, they want to share their candy with you, they give you best friend bracelets and do your hair, they climb all over you just wanting a hug and attention. But most of all, they listen intently when we talk about the gospel and they absolutely light up.

“Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.

“Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3–4).

I'll always remember my mom coming home from church one afternoon and saying that my little brother (then 5 years old) had been crying during a song they were singing in primary. She asked him what was the matter and he replied "that song just makes tears come out of my eyes." Little children are the prime examples of the kind of disciples we need to be. They are so close to the spirit that they don't question any feeling they have. 

I struggled with my testimony and having faith for a lot of years. My brain would go into analytical mode and I'd come up with every excuse under the sun for why the gospel wasn't true. I couldn't just say, "I know it's true because I feel it in my heart and I've prayed about it." I needed proof. Rarely do children need proof for things. They accept the answer, without reasoning, and go on with life. They see another child that's cold outside, and they want to help them! They cry when they've done something bad and realize that they shouldn't have done that. And they love unconditionally.I was having a really hard time voicing my testimony at a family's house the other day. I ended up just breaking down and the whole lesson was a mess of blubbering tears. Their little daughter came and just stroked my head while I talked and asked why I was crying. It made me cry even more! Yes because I miss my mom, but also because I know that was a small act of Heavenly Father showing me what HE would do if He were here.

Jean A. Stevens says, "Have some of life’s experiences taken from you the believing heart and childlike faith you once had? If so, look around at the children in your life. And then look again. They may be children in your family, across the street, or in the Primary in your ward. If we have a heart to learn and a willingness to follow the example of children, their divine attributes can hold a key to unlocking our own spiritual growth."

 

 Becoming childlike is not easy. Especially when we feel hardened from the world, like Jean A. Stevens talked about. But it is doable! It is something that God has asked of us! I know that our lives will become so much easier when we just accept the things of the Lord and do His will. When we love those around us, as children do, and we give our self to Him. Follow your children's example!

"If we have a heart to learn and a willingness to follow the example of children, their divine attributes can hold a key to unlocking our own spiritual growth."

-Jean A. Stevens

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/04/become-as-a-little-child?lang=eng

 

Departing Missionaries

A HUGE Thanks!

You've seen them on the road, you've seen them in your neighborhood, you may have even seen them on your front porch trying to talk to you about the gospel! Mormon missionaries. As missionaries we spend 18 months (girls), or 2 years (boys) serving the Lord and telling people about the good news. We believe that God has restored His church to the earth once more and that everyone should know!




Currently there are over 80,000 missionaries in the world. We serve in almost every country and love what we do. I am serving in the Tennessee, Nashville Mission. I love it so much. There are so many spiritual giants that I've gotten to work with and I wouldn't have spent this last year in any other way. Every six weeks, a new batch of missionaries comes out. They're brand new to the mission-field and filled with the desire to spread the gospel! At the same time, a batch of missionaries goes home. They've come to the end of their service and are completely different people from when they came out. They have stronger testimonies, humble confidence, and a desire to continue sharing the gospel for the rest of their lives.



I'm so grateful for the elders and sisters that are serving around me. We recently sent home an incredible group of men and women.

Elder Matthew Horner, Elder Jacob Clark, Elder Joshua Heath, Elder Freeze, Elder Brandon Bollschweiler, Elder Anthony Bassett, Tyler Duffin, Elder Cody Miller, Hermana Courtney Smith, Sister-Hollie Vandenberg, Elder Worthen, Elder Joshua Nield Elder Paul T. Farrell, Elder Chris Gwilliam, Elder Poulsen, Elder A. Miller, Elder Huntington, Elder Allen, Elder Steineckert

I want to thank all these elders and sisters for serving with their whole hearts. They were my leaders and examples and I know they were to everyone else as well. They truly changed the lives of many people here in the South, and their influence, no doubt, spread far beyond those boundaries. As they get to spend their first holiday at home in 2 years, I'm sure their families are so grateful for the blessings they brought. The Lord truly blesses those that are willing to consecrate their time to Him. Thank you elders and sisters for your service. We love you and we'll always remember you.

The Word of Wisdom

Your Body is a Temple!

It's a late chilly night and the Potter family flies on their Nimbus 2000's to the nearest waffle shop. They're fingers are numb, and their noses are cold after brilliantly fun, snowy game of Quidditch. The family sits down happily in a booth and start searching the menu. A waiter walks up and asks "could I interest you in any coffee?" All the kids shake their heads. "No thank you" says Harry kindly. "Alright, any tea?" The kids all shake their heads again. "No that'll be alright" Harry answers again. "Well any alcohol, tobacco, or illegal drugs?" Shaking of the heads. "Nah I think we'll just have 5 hot chocolates and waffle dinners please. Thank you very much though." The waiter is stunned. "Who are you people?" he whispers. "Us? Well we're just your average Mormons! We treat our bodies like temples because our Lord bought them with a price."
  

Ok so maybe this a little dramatic, but it's straight to the point. We all know you've heard those crazy Mormons don't drink soda, or have any fun in their lives. Rumors have spread that they'll turn you into their police if you drink around them. Well my friends, lets put all these rumors to rest and figure out, together, the real reason why Mormons follow a strict health code.  (Also sorry it's in italics... the computer apparently wants to look pretty.)

"Behold, verily, thus saith the Lord unto you: In consequence of evils and designs which do and will exist in the hearts of conspiring men in the last days, I have warned you, and forewarn you, by giving unto you this word of wisdom by revelation" D&C 89:4

When we are addicted to substances we have a hard time focusing on other things; especially the spirit. Think about the last time you were hungry; starving! You know that the only thing you could focus on was the nearest McDonald's. Maybe the person on the side of the road that needed help, was not even noticed! Maybe you were short with your child who just needed "to tell you somethin' daddy!"  This is the same with addictive substances. The famous 5 that I talked about at the beginning: coffee, tea, alcohol, illegal drugs, tobacco. When these things are in our lives, the spirit is not. God has told us this in the scriptures. Addiction to these things also results in a very hard time hearing the spirit!

The word of wisdom not only focuses the things that we shouldn't have, but the things we should have! The Lord explains that we need to use meat sparingly, and that fruits, vegetables, and grains are for our benefit. How lucky are we to have this! We know exactly what's healthy for us and what isn't.

Heavenly Father promises us so many blessings if we obey the Word of Wisdom:

 "And all saints who remember to keep and do these sayings, walking in obedience to the commandments, shall receive health in their navel and marrow to their bones;

And shall find wisdom and great treasures of knowledge, even hidden treasures;

And shall run and not be weary, and shall walk and not faint.

And I, the Lord, give unto them a promise, that the destroying angel shall pass by them, as the children of Israel, and not slay them. Amen."   D&C 89: 18-21

Aren't those amazing blessings? I can give up a trip to the local coffee shop for "great treasures of knowledge". Maybe that will help me with my chemistry! I think the coolest thing is that these revelations came in the 1800's, before there was scientific evidence to show how harmful coffee, tea, tobacco, and illegal drugs were. The only explanation is that Heavenly Father saw what was coming, as He always does. He knows exactly what is best for the bodies that He gave us. I am so grateful for that. 

What is the Word of Wisdom?

http://www.lds.org/topics/word-of-wisdom

Revelation in the Doctrine and Covenants-

http://www.lds.org/scriptures/dc-testament/dc/89

Becoming Gods

Becoming Gods?

Each area that I'm transferred to, the first concern that I hear about the Mormon church is almost always the same. Ok the second one.. (they all wonder what number of wife we are). The second thing they ask is "Don't y'all think you can become gods?" At first this question shocked me a little bit. This was doctrine that I didn't think was something people knew right off the bat, yet it was something everyone seemed to be wondering.

"The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:
And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together." -Romans 8:16-17 

Paul testifies that we are to become like God in this life, and the life to come. We are joint-heirs of His kingdom! What do you think of when you hear the phrase "joint-heir"? I think of learning how to be just like my Heavenly Father. Of Him teaching me how to be like Him and how to be a loving parent.
  

"Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust." 
-2 Peter 1:4
In 2 Peter, Peter talks to the saints about the promises that God gives us.We are to be partakers of His divine nature! Isn't that the most amazing promise? To be divine is to be like God. We will be like Him! He wants this for us. He wants us to become like Him because He is perfect.

Do Latter-day Saints believe they can become “gods”?
Latter-day Saints believe that God wants us to become like Him. But this teaching is often misrepresented by those who caricature the faith. The Latter-day Saint belief is no different than the biblical teaching, which states, “The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: and if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together” (Romans 8:16-17). Through following Christ's teachings, Latter-day Saints believe all people can become "partakers of the divine nature" (2 Peter 1:4).

I can understand where the miscommunication comes from. Some people have explained to me that they believe we aren't supposed to become like God because He is OUR God! That is completely right! We are only supposed to have one God that we worship, so is it offensive that we believe we will become like Him? Well here is a little analogy.

Harry has two wonderful parents. They love him and cherish him and want the best for him. Harry's parents each have a good job, and are able to provide well for their son. Well, Harry is now entering the young adult stage. He must make choices on where to go to school, what career he wants, who to marry, and how to raise his children. Harry's parents have done that already! They want him to make good decisions so that he can one day have a loving, well-functioning family too. Harry makes all the right decisions (with the wonderful support from his parents) and 10 years late he has a family of his own. Harry is now a parent! But.... he still has parents of his own. They will always be
his parents. They will always be the ones that raised him and helped him through life. But now he gets the chance to do that for someone else. And his parents are so proud that he does.

This is the same idea as us becoming gods and goddesses after this life. Heavenly Father wants us to become like Him. He wants us to become perfect! If we become like Him, then we will be royalty as well. But He will always be the one that we worship. He will always be there for us. Us becoming gods and goddesses will never diminish the fact that He is our King, our Father, our Lord. 

I know that Heavenly Father loves us so much. Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints know that He will always be our God and that He deserves to be worshiped with every fiber of our being. We do not obey so that we can become Gods. We obey because we love our Lord and we will never be able to repay Him. I know that the reason we are on this earth is to be tested. If we make the right decisions, we will be able to live with our family and Father in Heaven for eternity. He will teach us to become like Him. We will become joint-heirs!


Mormon Newsroom Article
http://www.mormonnewsroom.org/article/mormonism-101#C13